Sergei Rachmaninoff was a Russian composer, pianist, and conductor who lived from 1873 to 1943. He is widely regarded as one of the greatest composers of the late Romantic period, and his works continue to be performed and recorded to this day. Rachmaninoff was also known to have struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts throughout his life.
Rachmaninoff’s struggles with mental health began early in his life, when he was still a student at the Moscow Conservatory. He suffered from anxiety and self-doubt, and his first symphony was widely criticized after its premiere in 1897. The negative reviews left Rachmaninoff feeling deeply discouraged, and he fell into a depression that lasted for several years.
In 1899, Rachmaninoff began seeing a therapist who specialized in hypnotherapy. The therapist helped him to overcome his feelings of hopelessness and regain his confidence as a composer. Rachmaninoff went on to write some of his most famous works, including his Piano Concerto No. 2 and his Symphony No. 2.
Despite his success as a composer, Rachmaninoff continued to struggle with depression and anxiety throughout his life. He once wrote to a friend, “I feel like a ghost wandering in a world grown alien. I cannot cast out the old way of writing and I cannot acquire the new.”
Rachmaninoff’s struggles with mental health were exacerbated by a series of personal tragedies. In 1915, his daughter Sophia died of diphtheria, and in 1917, he and his family were forced to flee Russia following the Bolshevik Revolution. The stress of these events, along with his ongoing struggles with depression and anxiety, left Rachmaninoff feeling increasingly isolated and disconnected from the world around him.
In 1931, Rachmaninoff and his family immigrated to the United States, where he continued to compose and perform. He also sought treatment for his depression, seeing a therapist who prescribed him sedatives and other medications. Despite these efforts, Rachmaninoff’s mental health continued to decline, and he often expressed a desire to end his own life.
In 1943, Rachmaninoff died of cancer at the age of 69. Though he had struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts throughout his life, he left behind a legacy of music that continues to be celebrated and admired by musicians and audiences around the world.